I'm Thankful for My Wife

Category: By Christian
There are a lot of reasons to be thankful for Stacy. She's very kind. She laughs at my jokes. She bought me a smoker. On two separate occasions, even.

Currently, the biggest reason to be thankful for her is that she is carrying our child. That's a lot to ask of a person, even if they are joyfully willing (which she is). But this whole pregnancy thing hasn't been all that fun. For the life of her, she can't understand why they call it "morning sickness". Her particular sickness has been no respecter of time. And it hasn't even vacated the premises after the first trimester as is common courtesy. Nope. Just an onslaught of nausea.

At one point she asked me if I wanted to take a turn holding the baby. Man, I would if I could. This pregnancy experience is so much different from adoption. The economy is completely unbalanced, with her doing all of the work. I can be sensitive. I can be nice. I can do as much as I can around the house so that she doesn't have any more on her plate than she needs to have. But it still doesn't measure up to her level of commitment in the process.

I always thought it witty when Ray Ramano demanded more respect for his burden during his wife's...ahem...womanly times. "Hey, it's not unteri. It's uterus." Comedic genius for sure. And while factually correct, the statement misses the mark completely in it's demand for equal sympathy.

When we were adopting Elli, we were far more equally yoked. I was able to do a lot of the paperwork. We were more able to share in the birthing pangs of the process as it drew on longer than we had anticipated. It just felt like we far more in it together. And as a result, I think it drew us a lot closer.

Not that we aren't totally in love right now, because we are. But it's a completely different process from adoption, and one that isn't quite as conducive to a relationship taking that next step due to inequality of the burden. I have to admit. That's been a little bit of a stunner to me.

In my stunned state I still have great admiration for my wife. I am very thankful for her. Thankful that she has kept a good attitude. Thankful that she is a fantastic mother. Thankful that she is perhaps the toughest person I know. And thankful that she has remained remarkably graceful and low-maintenance even as she nurtures a fetus into a fully developed baby within the confines of her (ever growing) uterine incubation chamber.

That's what I'm thankful for.

Renew and Restore

3 comments so far.

  1. Kirsten Severson 10:30 AM
    Amazing blog, my friend. Stacy is one to be admired, cherished, and respected. She is strong. You guys rock. :)
  2. Michelle & Luke 12:33 PM
    WOW- you are a good husband to post something so nice. I will make sure luke reads this tonight. It may inspire him in the "supportive house-work helper" arena....
  3. Amy 3:29 PM
    Amen ... she's a trooper! Maybe you can volunteer to breastfeed in exchange for her doing the pregnancy part! :-)

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