Lusty Libation

Category: , By Christian
We spend a good deal of family time at the hospital. One of the downsides of residency. Though I will give it to Stacy's program, they are totally cool about resident's families coming for a visit. They have a pretty nice resident lounge with a big tv. All of the other residents make time to chat, even though they have a buttload of stuff to get done. I'd totally rather be in my own living room, but at least we don't get shut out.

One of the best perks is the food. It's hospital cafeteria food, so nothing to write home about. Nonetheless, there is always food when we go to visit. And drinks. Lots and lots of drinks. Stacy is very in tune with my drink preferences, so I often find a Sierra Mist, a fruit puree or a Vitaminwater waiting for me upon arrival. Talk about service.

A few weeks ago I popped open my Vitamin water, and boy was it tasty. So yummy. I downed that sucker like nobodies business. Curious as to what kind of liquid delight Vitaminwater had come up with, I checked out the label.

Special edition Sex In The City xxx antioxidant Vitaminwater featuring blueberry, pomegranate and acai. Oh boy.

Never before had I partook of such an erotic drink. Nothing like a little bottled sin to quench the thirst. But man. It was so good. And now I'm hooked. Every trip to the hospital, I'm picking one of those up. I figure that once the movie tie-in is over, that particular flavor is going to disappear, so I'd better live in sin while I still have the chance.

So yesterday, I'm at the store to pick up a banana to go with my lunch. And I get the urge. The urge for the unholy trio. I found one in the cooler near the checkout lanes and approached the cashier. I averted mine eyes in shame as she rung it up. I was hoping she'd just slip it into a brown paper sack and let me on my way in peace. Not so much.

"Ohhhhh. This stuff is the bomb. I used to drink it all the time."

Hmm. Apparently, I'm not the only fan. I was curious as to why the cashier didn't drink it anymore, however.

Diabetes. Too much sugar in the Vitaminwater.

Just goes to show you. Don't drink too much xxx Vitaminwater. You'll get diseases. I haven't heard of anyone getting pregnant from it yet, but I'm sure they are out there.

Renew and Restore

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